Independent Rs Messageboard

[steveqpr881]

Talking about the weather, I've just started e new job, in an air conditioner factory.
It's got a nice chilled atmosphere.

Fitz Hall - Bobby Ball.

[steveqpr881]

I'm really enjoying the Olympics. My favourite sport is blindfold archery.
What's that - you've never heard of it?? You don't know what you're missing!!

[steveqpr881]

Time to once more channel the spirit of the late Cyril Fletcher (off of That's Life), smooth down my velvet
smoking jacket (oh, get on with it - ed.), turn to the camera, simper and say,
"I am indebted to Daniel Wells, aka dannyboyurs off the old offy MB, for this ribbed tickler*"
I went to a flea market....all I got was a nervous tic.

*-it's not plagiarsm if you acnowledge your 'sauce'

[steveqpr881]

I threw a ball for my pet dog.......
OK, a bit extravagant, but he looked great in a tuxedo.

Interesting Fact:
The letter J was only added to the Welsh alphabet in 1987!

[steveqpr881]

2 young Americans (cue for a song?) knocked on my door yesterday, smart with short hair & suits
& asked if I'd ever considered the merits of brown bread.
They were Hovis Witnesses.

[steveqpr881]

Happy Birthday to U2 guitarist, The Edge.
Which reminds me of the time I bought a U2 satnav
(You've done this already - ed. I know, but this lot'll never remember)
It was rubbish; the streets have no name, and I still haven't found what I'm looking for.

[steveqpr881]

I'm making my own ladder. It's easy, with the step-by-step guide.

Who's got one leg, and likes chocolate? Willy Wonky!

[steveqpr881]

Well, that's the Olympics done for another 4 years & it made me think;
if Laziness was an Olympic sport I'd deliberately finish 4th, to save the walk to the podium.

Thought For The day:
Half the people you meet are below average.

[steveqpr881]

I bought a wig, it was only £20. I thought - that's a small price toupee.

Thought For The Day;
What happens if you get scared half to death twice??

[steveqpr881]

I went to a restaurant & the waiter asked me, "How did you find your meal?"
I said - "You put it down in front of me."

Thought For The Day:
If your car could travel at the speed of light, would the headlights work??

QPR Rhyming Slang:
Alan Harris - Mica Parris.