For all QPR and Non QPR threads that don't fit in the other areas.
steveqpr881
Posts: 1435
Joined: Wed Dec 01, 2021 9:58 am
Location: Running down the Uxbridge Road

Re: Joke Thread 3.0

Post by steveqpr881 »

Time once more to don my velvet smoking jacket & channel Cyril Fletcher off of That's Life to say -
I am indebted to Rs fan Dan Wells (dannyboyUrs off of the old offy mb) for this ribbed tickler, what he put on Facebook:
I've been invited to a combined Burns Night/ Chinese New Year party.
They're calling it a Chinese Burns party.
Wasn't going to go at first, but they twisted my arm. 8-)
Esther.....
steveqpr881
Posts: 1435
Joined: Wed Dec 01, 2021 9:58 am
Location: Running down the Uxbridge Road

Re: Joke Thread 3.0

Post by steveqpr881 »

Just found out I'm allergic to liquorice.
I've got allsorts of symptoms.
8-)
steveqpr881
Posts: 1435
Joined: Wed Dec 01, 2021 9:58 am
Location: Running down the Uxbridge Road

Re: Joke Thread 3.0

Post by steveqpr881 »

I told my doctor I was addicted to laptops; he put me on a course of tablets. :?

Found a wizard in my fridge, so I suppose we're in for a cold spell.
;)
steveqpr881
Posts: 1435
Joined: Wed Dec 01, 2021 9:58 am
Location: Running down the Uxbridge Road

Re: Joke Thread 3.0

Post by steveqpr881 »

A friend of mine's started working for a dictionary publisher.
I fancy a job there myself, so I asked him to put a word in for me. ;)

Went to an exhibition, all about shoemakers.
I wouldn't bother if I were you, it was a load of old cobblers. :)

Thought For The Day:
The problem with kleptomaniacs is, they take everything - literally.
:D
steveqpr881
Posts: 1435
Joined: Wed Dec 01, 2021 9:58 am
Location: Running down the Uxbridge Road

Re: Joke Thread 3.0

Post by steveqpr881 »

I entered a competition to design work-wear.
I was the overall winner!
:D

And today's Interesting Fact:
Yesterday, Feb. 4th, was a palindrome.
That is, the numbers read the same backwards, as they do forwards.
i.e., 4/2/24.
And that is the only palindrome date this year. Well I never!
steveqpr881
Posts: 1435
Joined: Wed Dec 01, 2021 9:58 am
Location: Running down the Uxbridge Road

Re: Joke Thread 3.0

Post by steveqpr881 »

I'm worried about my addiction to Join-The-Dots puzzles -
I don't know where to draw the line!
:?
steveqpr881
Posts: 1435
Joined: Wed Dec 01, 2021 9:58 am
Location: Running down the Uxbridge Road

Re: Joke Thread 3.0

Post by steveqpr881 »

I've just started a new job, recycling old shoes.
But I've got to give it up - it's sole destroying. :?

Today's Interesting Fact:
We all know that the tomato is a fruit; but did you know that
rhubarb is a vegetable? Well it is. Well-I-Never!
:ugeek:
steveqpr881
Posts: 1435
Joined: Wed Dec 01, 2021 9:58 am
Location: Running down the Uxbridge Road

Re: Joke Thread 3.0

Post by steveqpr881 »

Why was the baby jalapeno shivering?
Because it was a little chilli.
steveqpr881
Posts: 1435
Joined: Wed Dec 01, 2021 9:58 am
Location: Running down the Uxbridge Road

Re: Joke Thread 3.0

Post by steveqpr881 »

They say everyone needs a hobby, so I've taken up meditation.
Well, it's better than sitting around doing nothing.
8-)
steveqpr881
Posts: 1435
Joined: Wed Dec 01, 2021 9:58 am
Location: Running down the Uxbridge Road

Re: Joke Thread 3.0

Post by steveqpr881 »

Must admit, I'm a bit of a prude.
If I see any innuendo in a joke, I whip it out immediately :oops:

I opened my water & electricity bills at the same time; I certainly got a shock! :o

Top Tip:
Ladies, if your man says he'll do something, he'll do it;
there's no need to keep reminding him every 6 months.
8-)
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